In Memoriam - Phoebe Snow

Her last film appearance was in Patrick Ian Polk's "Noah's Arc: Jumping the Broom" during the lounge scene and wedding reception!

Blah Blah Blah....

idk if I said this in one of my last posts, but those damn neighbors across the hall moved and took their free wifi with them so I have to bring my laptop aaaaalllll the way out to campus just to blog :(

Because of it being Finals Week, the Study Hall is packed. I can't post pics because I don't want this lil old librarian to walk past and see a big ole' Mandingo Dick on the screen and have a heart attack!

And I really need to vent this time, so... just listen, or... read (you know what I mean).

1. I went to go see Scream 4 and it was the ISH! I HATE scary movies but I have always loved the Scream Saga because it's creative, clever, satirical... and I didn't have to pay for the ticket (I'm cheap, sue me). And all through the movie, we kept hearing a couple arguing in the back row. After the movie was over and all of the lights came on, I look back and realized it was my Ex! You may remember him from waaaayyyy back in the day during posts like "Update On My Dating" and then when it came down to me being Cold, Bored, and Single and I posted about that. So yeah, I turn around and he's arguing with some chick!

I don't have any hard feelings towards him; our breakup was mutual and there wasn't (much) drama behind it. But damn, seeing him argue with someone else helped me realize that it wasn't just all in my head--this mofo is just hard to get along with.

>>>> btw, the first song at the end Credits of Scre4m is by Ida Maria "Bad Karma". My gift to you:

Oh yeah, for those who remember me talking about him, the owner of the Club where I do Poetry Shows at sometime: well, he is sooooo trying to get him some! He hit me up on Facebook the other night and (in so many words) told me that now that I'm 21 he can finally give me free drinks at the bar w/o feeling like he's broken the law! And he says that he has a LCMV (Less Cranberry, More Vodka) made just for me whenever I take him up on his offer to "help him write some of that dope ass poetry".

*sighs* stay tuned for that. Wit his FINE ASS. SMH...

And these FINALS may not be as hard as I think they're going to be. As I'm reading through my notes, I've actually retained a lot more than I thought. So, we'll see...

Today is one of those days when I really don't feel like being bothered by people.
So of course, it's the busiest day of my life where EVERYONE needs something from me. Seriously, in the 15 minutes it's taken me to write this post, my phone has rang 7 times. Scratch that. 8 times now.

*sighs* I could use that LCMV right about now...


(p.s.) Just 'cuz you read through my blah blah blahs, enjoy this pic! It's one of my favorites~!

What The Fuck....If You Happy And Ya Know It, Clap Your Ass

This is video is something else. Some people just have too much time on their hands. LOL

I will admit he can sing. LOL

Kenny Loggins with Shanice Wilson - Love Will Follow

"I Hardly Ever Fall In Love, But..."

I’ve been getting HELLA emails about my last post, so I’m going to sum this thing up: I’m still torn between coming out to M or not. I really do cherish our friendship and I don’t want to ruin it, but if this is all it would take to screw it up, then it wasn’t much of one in the first place, right? Eh, well anyways, when I make a life decision on this thing here, I’ll definitely let you guys know.

>>>>>> moving on

NEXT WEEK IS THE LAST WEEK OF THE SEMESTER!!! But before I can throw a Sausage-Party, I have to study for these EFFING FINALS!!!! Ugh, can’t I just get my Degree already? This damn Religion in America course is going to skin me alive (I’m a Theology Minor), if this Advanced Analytical Research doesn’t already do it. *sighs*

But I guess that’s one of the good things about being single, right? I don’t have anybody to distract me with my studies. Only thing is, this is Passion Week (this is the week that changed the course of World History. Too much to say. Just Google it). 

I usually like to Fast during this time. But um…

Me + Empty Stomach + Academics=Epic Fail. 

So, I’m sure the Lord won’t mind…

Since I can’t Fast from Food, I Fast from my other biggest temptation. Three letters, one word: Sex.

And let me tell you: the more I refrain from it, the more it comes knocking at my door—literally!
Red Bone came knocking at my door last night at like 4 in the morning. No calls, no texts, no Facebook, nothing. He dropped by unannounced which is kinda rude, especially at 4 am. 

I wrapped my blanket around me because I woke up with a Woodie—and rushed to the door like Captain Save-A-Hoe thinking something was wrong—he was banging on my door like he was Five-O!

Luckily, it was just him, Horny as usual; I swear he’s a nympho… I have no other choice but to believe him when he told me he only sticks with “one dick at a time” because it’s the only way to explain why he’s always jumping on mine. (Or I might just have some Good Dick, wink wink).

I didn’t (couldn’t) tell him that I was Fasting; I just told him I’m trying to stay Abstinent for the rest of the week. 

I forget that this Negro is a PK (Pastor’s Kid, his dad has a church in Chicago) because he sighed and was like “Yeah, Yeah, it’s Passion Week, I know…”

I expected him to roll his eyes and catch an attitude like he usually does when I shoot him down. I was already coming up with some smart stuff to say…

But instead, he looked me in my eyes and told me he could settle for some Cuddle-action. I see no problem with that at all.

I’m no idiot: I realize this all sounds like some really cute, intimate affair—and it was. But we came into this “thing” telling each other flat-out that this is a purely Carnal relationship. Honestly: I don't feel either way about it. If anything grows from our "sessions" then it does. 

I say this with no Ego at all, but-- my Sex Game is just a commodity that comes along with my company. I think I'm a pretty decent "catch". 

Plus, as I’m writing this very post, I just received a text from him saying he wants to Fast with me. How cute is that?


 But this is all happening so fast. Not only is Red catching "Love-Eyes" for me, but DJ is putting in HELLA work on ya boi (more on him in the next post). 

And with Finals, Preaching, and Poetry Shows on my schedule for well into the middle of next month-- I have no time for anyone else! 

As I say before in a poem of mine: 

"I hardly ever fall in love but love hard when I do..."


P.S. When I'm 50 years old, will I look back at me at 21 and want to kick myself? I wonder these things...

(wish me luck on these damn Finals! Excuse me if there are any typos, I'm late for class)

Crooked Letter, Crooked Letter

We must bear witness. Support black LGBT filmmakers.

This is the kind of film that I would like to see made.

Dominic: A Love Letter is a short film about a young African American man who must cope with the profound loss of love he experiences when his family discovers his sexuality.  The film seeks to illuminate and deconstruct homophobia by exploring the cultural value systems, particularly in the African American community, that make such bigotry possible.

The film is in its early planning stages and the producers need to cover the production costs.  They are asking for our help. If you are so moved, please help in any way you can.  You can donate by visiting the Dominic: A Love Letter website

In the meantime, listen as co-creator, co-writer, co-producer, and co-star Acacia Morgan; co-creator, co-writer, co-producer, and co-star Damone Williams; co-director Jerome Watson; and co-director Gary Leroi Gray (of The Cosby Show and Noah's Arc: Jumping the Broom fame) discuss why they believe in this project--and why you should, too:

Follow Dominic: A Love Letter on Facebook or Twitter.

Kurt Carr - Set the Atmosphere

One of my all time favorite gospel songs

Sun Kist

Don't Be A Pussy!

She’s HELLA thick! About 5’6” she doesn’t have much going for her in the chest area but she has an ass to be rivaled with. And I’m not exaggerating just for the sake of it—I mean, she can tell Beyonce’ to redefine Bootylicious! And omg, her shoe game is on point as well. She has more stilettos than the law allows! For my birthday, she’s the one who organized all of the friends, bought all of the drinks, etc. The outfit she wore that night even gave ME a woody, and we all know how gay I am… smh…

She’s the one I talk about in my PreDICKament  post a while back. 

She’s one of my closest friends and I love her to death!


Okay, well, after the club, we all went out to IHOP. And blah blah blah, we had a great time and all that. We sat across from each other and she kept playing footsies with me under the table. Now, this was annoying to me for many reasons but I didn’t stop her. Idky… So, the night goes on and she’s like “do you have your phone with you? Because I’ve been texting you for a while…” I was still drunk and fumbled in my back pocket for my phone. I opened up the text message and this is what it read verbatim:

“Happy Bday [Cogito]. Let’s cut the bull. I’ma give you some Pussy for yo Bday…”


Many different things ran through my mind. This ALWAYS FUCKING HAPPENS TO ME!! Whenever a woman and I get mad cool with each other, somehow she always ends up wanting to jump my bones! I MEAN, THIS IS THE TYPE OF SHIT THAT STRAIGHT MEN DREAM OF, RIGHT? They can have it. Women have always felt comfortable coming to me for advice and stuff but it never fails… And then, when you turn them down, they’re like ????

Anyway, this was all a set up because she made me leave my car at the Poetry Spot so I HAD to crash at her house. Damn. So, I look up from my screen after reading the text message and she’s being coy. Continuing on with the convo of the table as if nothing ever happened. I didn’t miss a beat. Although I’m not straight, I’m sure many of the same rules still apply: mind games, lies, tricks, etc.

It’s like, I can attract very good women who will hold me down and provide all the things I’m looking for (and willing to give) in a relationship, BUT I CAN’T FIND A HALF-WAY DECENT GUY THAT’S NOT EITHER A HOE, LIAR, ATTENTION-WHORE, GOLD DIGGER, OR SOME COMBINATION OF THEM ALL!

And I even date Fems! That’s the thing! Like, I actually kinda like a guy with a lil “sugar in his tank” as the old folks used to say, lol. Don’t get me wrong, I’m not into Trannies or nothing like that though. And it’s not that I’m saying I’m not into “M” at all—she’s everything I could ask for in a spouse—but she’s a WOMAN! I’m GAY! That just doesn’t fly.

…so to save a lot of drama, I just sobered up and acted like I never received the text message and told her I was sober enough to drive home... 

I’m a total Pussy, I know. But hearts are some pretty delicate objects; especially women’s. 

Hell, if I just came flat-out and told her I was gay, she wouldn’t believe me anyway (unless I showed her this blog, lol). 

She’d probably just think it was an excuse to not sleep w/her because she’s unattractive or something. Far from it, girl. I’m just gay!

Of one thing I am certain: I care about her way too much to just string her along like this.
I think I'm going to have to let her know how I am.
I just hope it doesn't strain our relationship.
And if it does, won't that mean she was just trying to fuck me from day 1? 

*sighs* I need a drink…

Enjoy the pics!

P.S. If you’re not a Lil Wayne fan, it’s only because you haven’t heard Six Foot Seven. My gift to you: